Sunday, October 30, 2011

Strongbad

As part of our curriculum we are required to participate in projects that perform some sort of service to the community.  I was chosen to help the group that creates a pipeline from elementary school that eventually guides them to enroll in the university.  Our goal yesterday was to get the kids familiar with various health professionals and their roles.  My specific job was miscellaneous people directing, setting up tables for lunch, and otherwise doing what I'm told.  I was happily putting plastic table cloths on the tables when I was interrupted by the female student in charge, "No, those are for sitting."  I then proceeded to place the table cloths on the floor assuming she meant that the sixth graders will be taking their lunches on the floor.  A few minutes later she came by and exclaimed, "What are you doing?!"

"You said these were for sitting," I patiently explained.

"No, the tables, the tables are for sitting," she patiently explained to me.  "I'm not quite sure how literal I need to be with you, so can you move these tables to the other side of the room?"

Hmm, I think.  Being 'literal' was not her problem.  I think she meant 'ambiguous' concerning her less than specific pronoun, but I don't press the issue.  Funnily enough, we wound up putting table cloths on all the tables including the tables she originally told me not to cover, but I didn't survive this long in the world without knowing that bringing up that point would somehow be detrimental to my position.

Speaking of funny things that happen, S and I were sitting in Sacrament meeting trying to entertain C and I suddenly get a text.  Mom is usually the only person I know who texts me around that time so I look at it quickly.  I stifled a laugh as I read, "Hey so what's uppp and u should of come toe the dance it was funn [][]RaWr<3[][]." First of all, that's not Ally, that's not even...literate.



 Secondly, I am at church sitting next to my adorable wife and child and am really not interested in an extracurricular relationship right now.  Call it bad timing, but don't ever text back. :)  I've never received a text like that on my cell phone and I certainly don't give it out recklessly so when I got home I looked up the area code and traced it back to a place called Natrona, Wyoming.  Later that night, I got another text saying "Hey what's upp" with the same RaWr signature.  Shelli and I shared a pretty big laugh and she told me to text back and ask if it was Stephanie.  So I did and immediately got a text back saying, "No, brittany."  I hope I didn't crush her dreams of everlasting love, but I'm thinking she'll get over it soon.

Our anatomy block is over.  I passed Head and Neck with honors and I that makes me very happy.  To sum up my experience, I wanted to share some of my favorite Dr. Benninger quotes.  Dr. Benninger is a wonderful anatomist from England.  He is one of the editors of Netter's Atlas of Anatomy which is a standard textbook for all medical schools.  To date, he is also the best lecturer we've had.  He is submitting a proposal to the medical community to rename the twelve cranial nerves which have been doctrine for decades and he has sufficient clout that he may even succeed.  Because of him, my new favorite adjective is antisocial.

"Dr. Kuehn, you are a rockstar.  It's not all about looks now, is it?"
"When you receive a question like this, the only audible sound is that of puckering sphincters."
"We should return to the practice of a more civilized era when a student who gave me such a terrible answer would fall on his sword in shame."
"Vessels and nerves normally travel in threes with the nerve most superficial, then the vein, then the artery.  This is important to remember so when you do a nerve block you don't puncture the nerve.  That would be terribly antisocial."
"The lateral femoral cutaneous nerve is intimate with the psoas major, so those who do an antisocial number of situps might find tingling or starbursts in the skin it innervates."

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